If someone offering to help makes you tense instead of relieved, you're not alone. For many of us, accepting help isn't difficult because we're stubborn or overly independent. It's difficult because our nervous system has learned that staying in control feels safer than relying on someone else. This 10-minute guided practice is the first in the Accepting Help Series.

Control often looks like competence, but sometimes it's simply a nervous system trying to feel safe. Horse riding offers a fascinating lesson because you cannot fake calm around a horse. It responds to the signals your body communicates, not the story your mind tells. Sometimes the greatest shift isn't learning to control more, but discovering that safety can exist without holding everything together.

Have you ever noticed that people rarely hum when they're overwhelmed? We hum while cooking, gardening, folding laundry or walking the dog. Most of us have heard that humming stimulates the vagus nerve, but the science may be even more interesting than that. Every time we hum, we change the way we breathe, shift our attention inward and provide the brain with a different pattern of sensory information. Could that be one reason it feels so calming?

Have you ever felt like you're simply bad at relaxing? You may not be. For an overwhelmed nervous system, slowing down can initially feel uncomfortable because your brain suddenly becomes more aware of sensations and thoughts it has been filtering out. Discover five evidence-informed techniques that work with your nervous system—not against it—and learn the science behind why they help.